It hasn't been easy. And I mean...look at where I live.
[Korra passes over the bottle.]
I chose to live pretty far away from pretty much everybody. There's even the least amount of locals here. Where I can work by myself. And you're probably my closest and only actual friend in the world, so I wouldn't say I'm doing great at it.
[It's not like she's been making much effort to get close to people since Botan. And she knows, she sees it, but it's just easier.]
[Felix fills his glass and sets the bottle back down between them. In case she wants to move to straight rum, too. He takes a sip, and then another - and then he almost spits it out at what she says about him. He manages to swallow it, but coughs uncontrollably for a second afterward before he looks at her, somewhat incredulous.]
Me? I'm...I'm not...
[Friend material? Cut out to be someone's only friend? Very good at emotional support, or emotional anything for that matter?]
I'm a...strange choice. I would have thought you'd have plenty of friends. You're...
[He gestures vaguely at her. Use your words, Felix.]
Um. More tolerable than most.
[...Saints. He takes another generous sip of his rum.]
Yeah, people like me. That doesn't mean I let everyone in, you know? All I'm saying is that as great as I look like I handle things...that's just how it looks. And nobody really looks too closely and sees that I never go visit anyone, really. Or have people down here. Or do much besides train and work.
[That's just how it's worked out, and it's easier that way. Maybe it's not the healthiest way to handle everything, but...it's easy. And Korra feels like maybe she's earned taking the easy route for once.]
You don't have to get all weird about it, the point I was making is that I don't really have close friends.
There was a time when I was the same even with those whom I would otherwise call friends close by. It was the war that changed things, I suppose. Knowing that any battle could be the last for any of us. Fighting alongside each other day after day. It's difficult to keep much distance.
[It's said with a smile as Korra reaches for the bottle. No bothering with a glass at this point, she's not mixing it with anything.]
Yeah, I get it. That kind of thing really bonds people. Not so much of that around here, but...I'll figure my shit out eventually, I always do. It's like a cycle, almost. I get depressed and hermit myself and go 'why bother?' and then I can't take it anymore and decide that it's stupid not to live my life while I'm here. But I'm doing better than last time, I spent half a year in a mud hut in the middle of the woods.
[Felix rolls his eyes. He's not being weird! Whatever. He drinks some more of his rum.]
Mm. Sometimes it seems as though this wandering around of mine is akin to running away. But I don't want to go back yet. When I left in the first place, it was because I couldn't stand to be in that house anymore. Every time I think about returning, I hate the idea.
[And another drink.]
I'm sure Dimitri and Claude think I'm being selfish or something.
I don't think it's selfish. At least not the kind that's bad. You need to heal, you're taking care of yourself. That's important.
[And sometimes hearts took a long time to heal. It wasn't like a cut, where there's a general time frame and the healing can be easily measured. Korra understands it.
And the desire not to go home.]
You can crash here as long as you want, it's just me and the Pokemon.
[You're taking care of yourself. That's important. Is that really true? He's never heard anyone say such a thing before. He peers into his glass thoughtfully, then finishes it off and holds it out to Korra to fill a third time.]
Thank you.
[Then he glances sidelong at her with a bit of a smirk.]
I look forward to beating you in another game of hockey.
no subject
[Korra passes over the bottle.]
I chose to live pretty far away from pretty much everybody. There's even the least amount of locals here. Where I can work by myself. And you're probably my closest and only actual friend in the world, so I wouldn't say I'm doing great at it.
[It's not like she's been making much effort to get close to people since Botan. And she knows, she sees it, but it's just easier.]
no subject
Me? I'm...I'm not...
[Friend material? Cut out to be someone's only friend? Very good at emotional support, or emotional anything for that matter?]
I'm a...strange choice. I would have thought you'd have plenty of friends. You're...
[He gestures vaguely at her. Use your words, Felix.]
Um. More tolerable than most.
[...Saints. He takes another generous sip of his rum.]
no subject
[That's just how it's worked out, and it's easier that way. Maybe it's not the healthiest way to handle everything, but...it's easy. And Korra feels like maybe she's earned taking the easy route for once.]
You don't have to get all weird about it, the point I was making is that I don't really have close friends.
no subject
[What does that even mean?]
There was a time when I was the same even with those whom I would otherwise call friends close by. It was the war that changed things, I suppose. Knowing that any battle could be the last for any of us. Fighting alongside each other day after day. It's difficult to keep much distance.
no subject
[It's said with a smile as Korra reaches for the bottle. No bothering with a glass at this point, she's not mixing it with anything.]
Yeah, I get it. That kind of thing really bonds people. Not so much of that around here, but...I'll figure my shit out eventually, I always do. It's like a cycle, almost. I get depressed and hermit myself and go 'why bother?' and then I can't take it anymore and decide that it's stupid not to live my life while I'm here. But I'm doing better than last time, I spent half a year in a mud hut in the middle of the woods.
no subject
Mm. Sometimes it seems as though this wandering around of mine is akin to running away. But I don't want to go back yet. When I left in the first place, it was because I couldn't stand to be in that house anymore. Every time I think about returning, I hate the idea.
[And another drink.]
I'm sure Dimitri and Claude think I'm being selfish or something.
no subject
[And sometimes hearts took a long time to heal. It wasn't like a cut, where there's a general time frame and the healing can be easily measured. Korra understands it.
And the desire not to go home.]
You can crash here as long as you want, it's just me and the Pokemon.
no subject
Thank you.
[Then he glances sidelong at her with a bit of a smirk.]
I look forward to beating you in another game of hockey.